Out

Get me out. Let me leave. I don't want to be where I am anymore. School. People. My life. I wish it was a fairy tale. Where's the magic? The fairies? The wands and the cauldrons? I understand why stories are better than life. Because the ones that aren't are ignored. Or you have to think about your own life and reflect. But I don't want to do that. I want to run off into the woods and live with woodland creatures. I want my daydreams to be real. Why can't they be? Its much more fun in my head.

Am I crazy? No. No one makes their fantasy something they wouldn't want. Then it wouldn't be a fantasy. But I assume that most people's fantasies are to get their dream job and dream guy and not to have Doctor Who, Peter Pan, Harry Potter, and every other fiction story be true. I want magic. I want the wonder that comes with magic. I want to be an inventor.

Inventors are the new magicians. They designed the witch's broomstick to fit more people and be more comfortable so they made a plane. They wanted an invisible ghost to protect their house when they were away so they invented the security system. They were sad they couldn't turn one animal into two of the exact same so they invented clones. They didn't like when some people were disabled and left to fend for themselves so they invented bionic arms and legs, ones which are starting to develop a capability to respond simply to the wearer's thought.

I want to be an inventor. I want to create magic that people take for granted. I want to create magic that will have the unfortunate cry with joy. I want to create magic that doesn't do anything except make my favorite books come true.

Holograms. Hover cars. Teleporting. I want to make them. Not for me. Not for the people. For my fantasy. Regeneratable limbs, spiderman, werewolves, fairies. I want to create them. And I have. I've created them in my head and I've made them a story. I might write it down someday, but it isn't good enough yet. Because I'm the one who cries when a stranger sheds a tear, I won't become the mad scientist. I won't force people into cages to test my newest creation. But, oh, the things that I'm just itching to create, to have my monsters become the ones you see in every story. Because someone had to have come up with the werewolf, the vampire, the fairy, the griffin.

Its a wonderful story. I write a new chapter everyday. Its the reason I get no sleep at night. But I'm not sorry. I love this story. I think about how to make it better, how to make it less predictable, how to make it mine. Then I add in a couple more characters and a wistful new scene. I'm my own Doctor Who. If my mind were turned into a TV show, no one would watch. Not even me. Because a flat screen with a few little pixels cannot do justice to the things you can create in your mind. Its not something written on paper to make some money. As long as I keep it in my head, its the best story there will ever be.